Remember what I wrote ; if my connection with you really gave you such a terrible bad feeling, than I need not to be connected with you. And like you; I severd our connection, because that was what you or we seemed to be needing. Though it really hurted me that this was what you thought of me.

I didn't do anything to jusitify all those fears. Overthinking swept you away, into fear, I loved you as a friend. Nor would I've done anything to harm you, on the contrary I would have defended you fiercly to be who you are or aided you to become who you want to be.

I hope you heal. I wept ten-thousands times ten-thousands tears for this, and I was mad for this. And everytime I see you now I smile, and hope you are feeling well and inside I wish you all the luck and love in the world you deserve, because you are a brave person who walks in beauty.

That's what I recognized in you, while you asked me if you were a monster. And I thought no, you just follow your heart.

There is no you, there is only the state of freedom.
Be That.
Be free like the sky.
Be still like the hill.
Accept change like the seasons.
Be silent like complete emptiness.
You are That!

~ Ramana Maharshi

“Le vrai problème qui nous mène dans le mur – qui nous mène dans le gouffre, qui détruit les humains colonisés et invisibilisés d’une part, et les vivants non-humains d’autre part – ce n’est pas le manque de science, c’est le manque d’amour, de poésie et de compassion”

Aurélien Barrau

When feelings start getting real some people don't lean in. They pull away.
Not because they don't care - but because emotional closeness makes them feel exposed. Distance becomes protection. If this keeps happening to you, it's not coincidence. It's fear of emotional vulnerability.

RelationshipPsychology

You asked me not to forget you, and I smiled. Some things do not fade by choice. They settle into a man and become part of his silence. You remain in my thoughts, not as noise, but as order. When I pray, I do not search for words. Your name arrives on its own, steady and unshaken, like something already written.

How can I forget you, when I carry you within me? Not as longing that bends my spine, but as a weight that taught me balance. You are not a memory I revisit, but a truth I have accepted. I walk forward without looking back, composed and intact, knowing that some loves are not meant to be held, only honored.

— Chamod Senevirathne

"It takes courage to rest and play in a world where exhaustion is a status symbol."

“The goal is to develop the strength and grounding required to hold the tension of two opposing ideas until a new idea is born.”

~Brene Brown
Art: Michael Parkes

Be honest with yourself

What does that really mean?

The shared human experience

Many of us are seeking.
At different stages.
On different paths.

Yet almost all of us encounter the same thing
doubt.

It's part of being human.

Where we seek refuge

We often seek shelter in a journey.
Through knowledge.
Through devotion.
Through meditation.

All in an attempt
to return to the Self.

Looking outside for answers

We believe these paths will take us
where we need to go.
That they will lead us to freedom.

But pause for a moment.
Where is this journey really taking you?

What does returning to the Self truly mean?

The invisible force of conditioning

Without realising it,
we live inside layers of condintioning.

Ideas of what life should look like.
What succes means.
What is acceptable.
What is respectable.

These ideas quitly shape our choices.

Living a borrowed script

We begin following a script
written by society, culture, and fear.

Believing it to be truth.
Believing it to be us.

Slowly, we drift away
from what feels honest.

So what is honesty?

Honesty is asking yourself
Is this life aligned with who I am?

The more you look inward
the more stillness reveals itself.

You begin to unlearn.
You begin to question.
You begin to seek yourself.

The soul already knows.

Truth does not need to be created.
It needs to be remembered.

Honesty is seeing yourself clearly
and choosing to live that truth
even when it feels uncomfortable.

Even when the world questions you.

Take takes courage.

What spiritual life really means.

A spiritutal life is not an escape.

It is the willingness
to meet yourself where you are.

Beyond labels.
Beyond roles.
Beyond identity.

To walk a path that is truly yours
even when it looks nothing like the plan.

Where truth leads

As conditioning fades
clarity grows.

You need less guidance from outside
because something within becomes audible again.

So ask yourself gently
Is this life truly mine
or a conditioned version of me?

Your truth is where
real joy and contentment live.

Harshnachandolia
Art: Art Cour

Ikzelf ben m'n eigen val,
waaruit ontsnappen onzinnig lijkt!

Ikzelf ben m'n eigen groei,
waarvan ontplooing zeker is!

Fré 1/4/1999

IK STEL ME VOOR.... (Opgedragen aan Anke)

Lachende glitters die twinkelen rond en dansen in je ogen.
Zwijgende muziek die ons omringd en die we toch horen.
En twee kleine kaarsenhartjes die kloppen als één vuur.
Zonder tijd, zonder duur.

Glinsterende druppels die je huid ontdekken,
haar lichtjes kussen als tranen uit mijn ogen.
Ik stel me voor een wind van regenbogen,
die waait als een vurige zon.

Golvende weiden, blauwe bergen, ik stel me voor,
met ingehouden adem die nauwelijks je huid streelt,
maar toch met de druppels verstoppertje speelt.

Je moet durven dromen, geloven in jou,
dat stel ik me voor en droom.
Maar bovenal stel ik me voor hoe ik van je hou.

Fré 31-07-87

Ik heb geen woorden meer, om de pijn te verzachten;
de tranen te laten drogen op't moment dat ze vloeien
Ik heb geen woorden meer om de blijde herinneringen
te kunnen herinneren op 't moment dat we ze vergeten.

Ik heb geen woorden om de zorgen te verlichten als ze
t'zwaarst moeten zijn, behalve dan twee armen en zachte
lippen die niets dan zwijgen kunnen, maar ook kussen.

Fré 15-02-94

Ik betreur de dichter in mij,
die hier op deze plek leven moet,
deze tranenvallei waar hij zijn tijd verdoet.

Dichter in mij die leven zal,
tussen zwartgrijs beton,
met het kleine brandende kristal,
vergeet de klachten en niet de zon!

Hemelsblauw en watervalsgoud,
dat druppelt uit je ogen,
kleuren deze plek waarvan je houdt,
elke lange dag in nieuwe regenbogen.

Fré 10-8-86

Ik draag m'n eenzaamheid, als een gloeiende ziekte,
een bol van tranen rond mij, overal waar ik ga en sta.
Niets en niemand, kan er door, als ik de deuren niet
open zet. Maar mijn angst is als een roestig hangslot,
dat jaren na elkaar afgesloten hield wat ik als echt
voelde, alhoewel dat veel en veel te relatief was.

Fré 27/07/94

T'lijkt alsof ik alle gedichten, die te schrijven zijn,
al geschreven heb. Alsof heel m'n gevoel vergoten is
met cartouches blauwe en zwarte inkt.

Telkens weer bladeren tussen eergisteren en t'verleden.
Ritsels, als pagina's in kloosters waar mannen met bruine pijen
biddend, wachten op de dood.

Hoor mij aan dan. Waar wend ik mij heen
voor nieuwe woorden, die verbergen wat ik zoek?
Hoor me, waar!

Alsof iemand een kaars aansteekt in t'donker
fluistert t'licht me een antwoord toe;
waarom stilstaan en overschouwen, ben je dan al moe?

Fré 11/7/92

Hoe

Hoe komt het dat Liefde
zo bijt? Alsof ze blijkbaar,
nooit toegeven kan.

Hoe komt het dat dit lijden
smaakt naar meer?
Hoe kan deze dans van de eeuwigheid,
zich in elk hart vlijen?

Het mirakel van de Liefde is de pijn.

Fré 1/4/1999

Hoe kan je verdwalen?
Als elke ademteug je dichter
naar huis brengt?

Fré

Het is gemakkelijk om
jezelf te verliezen, hier
tussen niets en nergens.
Als het vallen van een snel
verdampende druppel, steeds
opnieuw en opnieuw, stukjes
van jezelf te verliezen.

En alsof dat nog niet erg
genoeg was, groei je weer,
heel even.

Het is gemakkelijk om jezelf
te verliezen, hier in dit
niets en nergens. Wie kan
je hier nog terugvinden, wie
durft hier te komen?

Het enige dat je dan nog
hoort is je ademen en dat
van de wereld. Zacht verloren,
innerlijk beven.

Fré 7-1-93

SEPT 96

Herfst, begint
regen steeds meer, verrast
drast achter ons neer.

Mist langs de bermen
vergeten de warme zon.
Druilerig leven, help me de kou
van naderende winter doorstaan.

Want in deze lengende nachten
verzucht ik steeds meer naar die
schijnbaar nooit aanbrekende lente
in mijn doods en bar aards bestaan.

Mooie kleuren echter, verzachten de pijn,
waar zijn die s’nachts toch heen? Bestaan ze
nog wel als t’donker ons omgeeft en we zelf
niet meer weten welk licht we kunnen zijn?

Fré 23/1/1996

Heel dit trillend wezen, dat ik maar niet
tot uitdrukking kan brengen; omdat mijn
rede de draad niet vind, ligt gebonden aan
reddingslijnen van de liefde.

Ze houdt me gekluisterd aan ‘t leven, zie hoe
de zon in alle dromers, s’nachts nagloeit. Om
dan dronken van zijn, in te slapen tot niets, dan
de andere zijde van’t licht.

Weet me te vertellen, hoe en wat achter de façade
van het uiterlijke, leer me zijn!

Fré 4/9/1995

Heb je laatst ook de koude gevoeld?
Dat kille klapperende gevoel,
dat liggen rillen onder de dekens?
Niet kunnen slapen, als een koud ei,
dat in de diepvries op bevruchting wacht,
met middenin jij!

Zoveel sterren, zoveel dromen
en toch nog wachten op vergetelheid,
da's soms waaraan ik lijdt.

En dit rillen in mijn lijf?
Dat hoort zo, lijkt me,
bij't uitbroeden van dit ei.

Fré 24/12/92

I

Verwonden harten elkanders dromen,
of is het enkel mijn hart dat droomt?
De koude kan het niet laten om elke keer
weer te verschijnen, te trekken enkele lijnen
in je hart.
Arm hart, arme muhadjdinn, zoveel gevechten
die je moet leveren, zoveel vrienden door jezelf
omwonden en verloren.

II

Slapend breng je het meeste door,
wakker wordt je als je liefde lust.
O hart, klokwerk van dromen!
Je taak is te geven zonder te verwachten.
Zoveel gevechten tegen onverschilligheid,
zoveel warmte voor deze koude wereld!

Fré 31/3/1999

Oh soms zijn jullie zo gemeen, lachend hard,
zeker van jullie visie en gelijk, arme stumpers.
Van wat waar, maar niet perfect is, maken jullie
fout en van wat juist is, laten jullie niets over
omdat de spaanders daarvan begeerd zijn, onder
hen die streven naar macht.

Zie de nacht, zie het zand van de woestijn in de ochtendschemer
waar is wat en wat is waar, wie ben jij en wat zijn de sterren
naar waar je opziet? Welke vreemde ben je als je geen vriend
meer kunt zijn, van hen die je tegenkomt op je weg? Voorwaar
soms zijn onze ogen veel te hard. Soms veel te zacht.

Fré 31/3/1999

Verdraai je de grenzen niet,
als je herinnert, als je denkt,
als je verbeeld, als je droomt ?
We vergeten dit heel snel en staan
er niet bij stil, gaan gewoon door.

Maar ieder heeft de innerlijke kracht,
om te zijn, om te worden wat je graag
wilde zijn. Daarom is het belangrijk
stil te staan bij waarom je snel verder
gaat. Onderken dit en wees vrij.

Fré 31/3/99

Dit is een gedicht voor mij, om me te vertellen
dat wanhoop niet eeuwig duren kan. Dat geluk
bestaan kan, zonder het te moeten najagen.
Dat liefde echt kan zijn, en we daarom zo bang
zijn voor elkaar. Dit is een gedicht voor mij,
omdat ik me eenzaam voel in een natte, donkere
stad, aan de grenzen van de lichten, glimt de weg.

Dit gedicht moet m’n donkerte bestrijden, de angsten
en demonen opnieuw verslaan, voor de zoveelste maal.
Put kracht uit het licht van de liefde, zelfs al ken je
alleen de blinddoek voor je ogen, die tranenlopers.

Fré 25/5/95

Gevlochten gedachten,
rond mijn gevoelens,
veranderen van kleur.
Patroon van stille klachten.

Gevoelens van onzekerheid,
bij die verre blikken in de tijd.
Ze verzachten geen vragen,
waarop het hart bonkend naar
antwoorden verlangt.

Fré 13-11-88

Most people still don’t know this…The Kundalini serpent is NOT “evil,” “dangerous,” or “demonic.”
It is the Divine Feminine rising inside you, the same sacred force our ancestors honored in Kemet, Kush, India, and every ancient civilization.
The serpent is symbolic because the divine feminine (soul) moves, coils, flows, and awakens like electricity traveling up the spine.
She is your intuition
She is your creativity
She is your healing
When the Kundalini rises, you’re not “possessed”, you’re finally connected. Connected to your higher self, the cosmos, and the original blueprint you came here with.
This is why patriarchal religions tried to demonize it. If you fear the Divine Feminine, you fear your own power.
The rise of the serpent is the return of mama.
The return of balance.
The return of the real YOU.
Tap in. Mama has been waiting on you.
~ Unknown

“The Tantric sages tell us that our in-breath and out-breath actually mirror the divine creative gesture. With the inhalation, we draw into our own center, our own being. With the exhalation, we expand outward into the world.”

― Sally Kempton, Awakening Shakti: The Transformative Power of the Goddesses of Yoga

Don't fight in the North or the South.
Fight every battle, everywhere, Always
in your mind. Everyone is your enemy.
Everyone is your friend. Every possible
series of events is happening all at once.
Live that way and nothing will surprise you.
Everything that happens will be something
that you've seen before.

Petyr 'Littlefinger Baelish - Game of Thrones

Most people think healing makes you softer — kinder, more open, more forgiving. Carl Jung saw it differently.

A healed empath does not become gentle. They become immune. Not to pain — to manipulation. Not to emotions — to control. Not to connection — to unconscious games.

The empath who once absorbed everyone’s chaos learns to see without carrying it. When that happens, entire power dynamics collapse.

Jung knew sensitivity isn’t weakness. It’s perception. And perception, when paired with boundaries, becomes power.

Empaths weren’t broken — they were untrained: betrayed, emotionally overloaded, used as buffers for other people’s unresolved shadows. What looked like weakness was actually preparation.

The reversal comes when the empath integrates their shadow and stops rescuing, absorbing, and sacrificing themselves for other people’s comfort. This isn’t becoming cold — it’s becoming whole.

Not about domination or manipulation. It’s about psychological sovereignty. You were never meant to save everyone. You were meant to see clearly. And when you do, the pattern ends.

Katia Jean

Master yourself and you will never need to control the world. The world outside is only a reflection of what is happening within you. When your mind is disciplined, your emotions are steady, and your actions are intentional, chaos slowly loses its power over you. You stop reacting to noise, stop chasing validation, and stop being pulled in every direction by fear or desire.

The one who rules himself moves with clarity even in uncertainty and stands firm when everything around him is shaking. This kind of mastery cannot be taken away, challenged, or destroyed. Power over others fades with time, but power over yourself remains. And in that quiet inner control, you already possess everything that truly matters.

— Chamod Senevirathne

Men don’t pull away quickly.
They detach after the effort: after explaining, after forgiving, after giving chances.
Before detachment comes the quiet phase: he gets calmer, talks less, stops reacting.
That’s not peace.
That’s him already leaving inside.
The moment he accepts
“she knows exactly what she’s doing... and still does it”, something dies.
Respect. Hope. Emotional investment.
He doesn’t detach because love vanished.
He detaches because love started costing too much.
Men don’t pay for pain indefinitely.
When detachment locks in, he stops negotiating, stops proving, stops chasing.
Not from rage, from cold clarity.
That’s why tears later, apologies later, affection later won’t bring him back.
The lesson already landed.
He might stay polite. He might stay physically present.
But emotionally? He’s already gone.
A woman thinks: “He’ll come back.”
A man thinks: “I won’t make that mistake twice.”
Different logic. Different endings.
Once he detaches, you don’t lose a boyfriend.
You lose the man who once cared the deepest.

Art: SekienSatori

"... If you can love someone with your whole heart, even one person, then there's salvation in life. Even if you can't get together with that person..."

Haruki Murakami

Unintegrated sexual energy searches endlessly for completion outside the self. It attaches itself to unavailable partners, to intensity without intimacy, to repetition disguised as passion. Many people learn to eroticize what destabilizes them, mistaking anxiety for excitement, longing for connection. The body remembers what the mind has not yet named. It remembers abandonment, unpredictability, the relief that follows emotional pain. Over time, this pattern hardens into what is often called a trauma bond.

A trauma bond does not feel like suffering at first. It feels like recognition. Like inevitability. It convinces the self that this depth of feeling must mean something profound. Yet what binds is not love, but familiarity. The nervous system clings to what it knows, even when what it knows is painful. In this way, trauma becomes seductive. It promises resolution through repetition, healing through endurance.

The tragedy of the trauma bond is that it trains the self to equate love with self-erasure. Boundaries feel like abandonment. Calm feels like boredom. Safety feels undeserved. The individual remains loyal not to the person, but to the hope that the wound will finally be healed by the same conditions that created it.

Breaking a trauma bond is not an act of will; it is an act of mourning. One must grieve the fantasy of repair, the imagined future where suffering is retroactively justified. Only through grief does clarity emerge. And clarity, once felt in the body, is irreversible.

This is where inner healing begins—not as a sudden transformation, but as a slow reorientation. Healing does not ask who hurt you first. It asks what you learned to tolerate. It invites the self to notice where energy leaks, where desire overrides discernment, where intimacy is confused with intensity. Healing is a return to the body as a trustworthy narrator.

As healing deepens, feminine energy resurfaces naturally. The need to chase dissolves. Attraction shifts. One becomes less interested in being chosen and more interested in choosing well. Sexual energy no longer feels urgent; it feels spacious. Desire aligns with self-respect. Pleasure becomes possible without dissociation.

Inner healing teaches that intimacy is not something one earns through suffering. It is something that arises when two people are present without defense. It does not demand endurance, confusion, or self-sacrifice. It requires honesty, nervous system safety, and the willingness to remain whole.

In this return to the self, something essential is reclaimed: the right to feel without apologizing, to desire without abandoning oneself, to love without losing one’s center. Feminine energy, sexual energy, and healing cease to be separate concepts. They become expressions of the same truth—that wholeness is not found in intensity, but in integration.

And integration, once lived, becomes unmistakable.

Ancestral Healing

When she speaks to the God in me, I don’t just hear her I feel her. Her voice settles into my spirit, commanding my attention in a way that’s both grounding and intoxicating. I admire her mind as much as I desire her presence. The way she thinks, the way she sees the world, the way her wisdom sharpens mine it draws me closer. Iron sharpens iron, and real always recognizes real. There’s an undeniable power in a relationship built on mutual respect, compromise, and a willing surrender to one another’s strengths.
A man who is truly in tune with his soul doesn’t want a woman who simply agrees with him —he craves one who can challenge him, teach him, and pour into him. That’s why I ask deep questions, why I linger on her opinions, why I study the rhythm of her thoughts. It’s not an interview; it’s intimacy of the mind. I’m too aware, too intuitive, too intentional to give my energy to just anyone. My time is sacred, and so is my heart. Degrees and titles don’t impress me nearly as much as common sense, emotional awareness, and spiritual wisdom. She is meant to be my right hand, my backbone, my safe place when the world feels heavy. We are meant to build, hustle, and dream side by side two powerful spirits aligned, not competing. When ego steps into love, connection weakens. But when humility and trust lead, passion deepens, and unity becomes unbreakable. She must be strong enough to speak truth to me, to correct me when I stray, yet gentle enough to let me lead with confidence. That balance that dance between strength and softness is what makes love feel electric. When a woman truly understands how to love a man she respects, he will open his world to her without hesitation. Real love isn’t bound by selfish motives; it’s a continuous journey toward becoming one.
She speaks to the God in me, and I worship the goddess within her. We feed each other’s dreams, breathe life into each other’s ambitions, and even when tension rises, we protect the bond we share. Loyalty is more than faithfulness it’s choosing each other daily, emotionally, spiritually, and passionately. We become each other’s muse, not a burden, inspiring one another to rise higher in love, purpose, and desire.

~ Darryle Hughes
Art: From Divine Creation - Mahaboka

“If you're losing your soul and you know it, then you've still got a soul left to lose”. - what matters most is how well you walk through the fire”

Bukowski.

When a man stops fighting for you, understand something.
He didn't stop caring. You thaught him his effort doesn't matter.
Every gesture dismissed. Every attempt to lead met with resistance
or criticism. That is not him giving up on you. That's him finally
accepting the pattern. Men don't bond through talking about feelings.
They bond through action, through providing. Through showing up
and having that presence felt. When a man offers his time,
his resources, his protection, and you treat it like it's expected
instead of valued, something inside him shifts.
Not dramatically, quietly. He doesn't announce he's pulling back.
He just stops extending himself into spaces where he's not honoured.
That is self preservation. That is maturity.
And here's what women miss. A good man doesn't need you to perform or be perfect. He needs you to receive what he gives with grace.
He needs his effort to be met with appreciation, not demands for more. When you weaponize his consistency, when you take his stability for granted, you create the very distance you'll later cry about.
Men don't go cold because they're heartless.
They go cold because warm doesn't work when it's not reciprocated.
If he's still showing up, still trying, honour that before he stops
trying altogether. Energy matches energy. Every single time.

allurianillc

If a man has no friends pay attention.
If a man has no friends or only a very small circle,
do not get it twisted that is not a red flag,
that is a man who has mastered himself.
A man without friends or with a very small circle
is a very secure man.
He has learned that quality matters more than quantity
and he does not need an audience to validate his worth.
His confidence comes from inside not from the approval
of others. He is not affrain to be alone, because
he knows his own strength. He is very selective with his
energy and with who he lets into his life and that is
a good quality to have.
He walks away from drama and gossip because he has
build a peaceful life for himself and does not want
to let that go. He does not need to be surrounded
by people to feel complete. He is comfortable,
he is grounded, he is steady and he does not waste time
on meaningless relationships. He knows what he wants and
he does not wate time chasing things that do not matter.
So if you come across a man with very few friends or
a very small circle do not underestimate him that is
not loneliness that is discipline. He knows peace, that
is not isolation, that is self mastery and men, like that
are the hardest ones to replace.

Art:Julia Pavlova

The Path of the Sword: Samurai Teaching

In the samurai tradition, the sword was not just a tool of combat, but an extension of the warrior's soul. Beyond its blade, the sword embodied discipline, respect, and constant pursuit of inner refinement. The sword was to be handled with precision and humility, not losing sight that each cut was not just a physical act, but a reflection of the spirit. One of the best-known principles in sword art is the concept of “mushin” ( ios), which means “empty mind”. This state of mind entails acting without distractions, without fear or doubt, allowing the warrior to merge completely with his sword and with the present moment. In combat, the mind should not be occupied by thoughts of victory or defeat, but focused solely on the flow of action. Thus the sword becomes a channel for concentration and precision.

Miyamoto Musashi, one of Japan's greatest swordsmen, in his famous treatise "The Book of the Five Rings", emphasizes that true mastery in the sword art lies not only in technique, but in mental and spiritual control. In one of his teachings he says: “The true art of the sword is to never dismantle it unless it is absolutely necessary.” "This lesson reminds us that the power of the sword lies both in its use and in its containment. In everyday life, these sword-handling teachings have profound applications. Learning to live with mushin, focused on the present, allows us to act with clarity and determination, without getting caught up in thoughts or emotions that deviate our path. The sword, in this sense, becomes a symbol of the ability to cut through what limits us and to move accurately toward our goals, both on the battlefield and in life.

Gabriel Benitez©

Loneliness

I too have known loneliness.
I too have known what it is to feel
misunderstood,
rejected, and suddenly
not at all beautiful.

Oh, mother earth,
your comfort is great, your arms never withhold.
It has saved my life to know this.
Your rivers flowing, your roses opening in the morning.
Oh, motions of tenderness!

~Mary Oliver
Art: Stephanie Law

Never reject something a child gives you.

Not the crumpled drawing.
Not the dandelion with a broken stem.
Not the rock they swear is special.
Not the sticky hug.
Not the story that makes no sense.

When a child gives you something,
it is not a transaction.

There is no hidden motive.
No strategy.
No ego.
No manipulation.

They are not trying to gain status.
They are not trying to impress you.
They are not calculating what they’ll receive in return.

They give because their spirit overflows.

They give because love moves through them naturally.

They give because joy feels too big to hold alone.

And when you brush it off, laugh at it, or treat it as small —
you are not rejecting the object.

You are rejecting their offering.

To a child, that rock is treasure.
That drawing is sacred.
That wildflower is medicine.
That hug is ceremony.

Our people understood this.

Children are closest to the Creator.
Closest to memory.
Closest to truth.

They don’t give for applause.
They give because their hearts are still clean.

One day the world will try to teach them conditions.
It will try to teach them to measure, to withhold, to protect.

But right now?
They are pure giving.

So when a child hands you something,
receive it like it matters.

Because it does.

You are being trusted with something holy.

And the only thing they get in return…
is the look on your face.

Make sure it tells them their love is safe here.

AnishinaabeHealing
Art: Lucy Campbell

You can't deny it
We can't let ourselves go.
And I understand it... who knows how many lives we've been searching to arrive at this exact moment, at this exact point in time where our paths cross and something in us remembers.
You can't deny what the brain tries to understand, what the heart beats without permission, and what the soul simply knows.
Yes, we are scared. But we also want, really want, to see what happens when fear doesn't rule.
This burning among us is not any random fire.
It could consume us if we don’t take care of it, or it could be that holy fire that transforms, cleanses, teaches. That fire that does not destroy, but awakens.
With you I understood that one can be the journey, but not always the destination.
And yet you were both: the path that showed me what I am and the place where I finally understood that to love was not to possess, but to see, to accompany, and to let be.
You were that trip that one takes as a child, with eyes open to wonder and a heart willing to do everything.
At first I didn't know how to appreciate you, but as time went by, I just wanted the journey to never end.
And then I realized:
you weren't an easy trip...
you were the fucking final destination,
the stop where one learns to let go, to love without chains, to burn without fear.
Yes, there will be other journeys, other landscapes, other heartbeats.
But there are fires that leave their mark on the skin of the soul.
And you, you were that fire to which one would return without hesitation,
because you can't deny it when something teaches you to live awake.

~ The Magø

If you were truly rational you would terrify yourself.

Most people who think of themselves as rational are not talking about truth, they're talking about stability what they mean by rational is I stay calm, I stay coherent, I can explain myself, this isn't rationality, this is emotional regulation with better vocabulary.
True rationality doesn't soothe you, it doesn't reassure you and it certainly doesn't make you feel wise, it destabilizes you. People imagine rationality as clarity and maturity as rising above emotions and bias, but what they're really describing is the ability to remain justified.
Rationality as most people practice it, is a defence against exposure. It let's you sound thoughtful while preserving innocence. It lets you stay reasonable without seeing to much of how your life actually works. True rationality doesn't do that, it doesn't leave you intact.
Here's the first thing real rationality removes, the belief that you're driven by intention, you know what you want, you don't know what you want, you experience your reasons as causes, they aren't. They're explanations you build after you act, so you can keep feeling like the author of yourself.
When rationality goes far enough that story collapses.
You see that your calm has function, your patience has benefit, your goodness has payoff, not because you're corrupt but because you're caused and that recognition is terrifying. Because once causation is followed far enough more certainty collapses. You begin to notice how neatly your virtues line up with your comfort, your patience keeps you in control, your generosity secures loyalty, your reasonableness prevents challenge, this doesn't make you bad, it makes you explainable and most people can't tolerate that.
This is why reason feels like threat, not because it's cruel but because it attacks identity, beliefs are easy to change, identity is not. You can swap frameworks, politics, philosophies without much disturbance. But when rationality starts showing you what you've been organized to be, everything shakes. Because now the question isn't is this true, it's who am I if this is true and that's where people turn away.
Watch what happens when rationality gets close, anger dressed up as ethics, withdrawal dressed up as self care, dismissal dressed up as compassion, these aren't arguments they're reflexes. People love reason as long as it's aimed outwards, at systems, at institutions, at other people but the moment it turns inward, the moment it dismantles moral innocence it's called cold, inhuman, dangerous. That's not hypocrisy that's survival, survival of identity. True rationality collapses moral identity, moral identity depends on partial sight, it depends on foregrounding intention and backgrounding consequence. It depends on telling a story where you're the reasonable one, the caring one, the one trying their best.
Rationality doesn't allow that story to stay untouched, it shows you how often morality functions as insulation, how often your ethics preserve belonging, how often your goodness stabilizes your position. Rationality doesn't accuse you, it just removes the fantasy that morally explains you.

Deborah Butler

Ego is one of the fastest and quietest destroyers of relationships.

Ego turns love into a competition instead of a partnership. It makes one person focus on being right rather than being kind, on winning arguments rather than protecting the connection. When ego is in control, listening becomes defensive, apologies feel like weakness, and understanding is replaced with pride.

In relationships, ego blocks growth. It resists accountability, refuses vulnerability, and prevents honest communication. Instead of asking, “How can we fix this together?” ego asks, “Why should I be the one to change?” Over time, that mindset creates emotional distance, resentment, and silence.

Ego also minimizes your partner’s feelings. It dismisses their pain, invalidates their experiences, and prioritizes self-image over emotional safety. When someone feels unheard or unseen long enough, love slowly erodes.

Healthy relationships require humility. They thrive when both people are willing to admit mistakes, lower their defenses, and choose connection over control. Letting go of ego does not mean losing yourself; it means valuing the relationship more than your pride.

At its core, love asks for maturity. Ego resists it.

Ancestral Healing

We were born with silence,
and as we grew up we lost the silence
and we were filled with words.

We lived in our hearts,
and as time passed we moved into our heads.

Now the reverse of this journey is enlightenment.

It is the journey from the head back to the heart, from words back to silence,
getting back to our innocence in spite of our intelligence.

~ Eckhart Tolle

The most vulnerable thing you could possibly do
isn't share how someone's actions have hurt you.
It's not ask them for more what you've been getting.
It's not to express your feelings or to share how
your trust has been broken.
Vulnerability is none of those things.

Vulnerability is being willing to let go of the
resentment you've been carrying.
Vulnerability is breaking the cycle of making
someone else's behavior all about you, your feelings
and your experience.
Vulnerability is being willing to forgive, to be
patient, to give grace and compassion.
Vulnerability is supporting someone to become
exactly who they want to be, even if it's not who
you want them to be.
Vulnerability isn't asking but being willing to hear
a no even if it means them choosing their truth.
It's recognizing that sometimes life hurts, but
that's no reason to play small.

It's recognizing that you can handle the truth
even if it's hard. It's about putting yourself
in a position where you could be hurt. It's the
state of being open to harm, influence, or emotional
exposure. And it's core it implies openness without
guarantee of control.

Vulnerability is allowing yourself to be hurt,
not out of recklessness, but in recognition that
the rewards of life are reserved for those
who rise when knocked down, who stand for greatness
when circumstances dictate defeat, who bury the
burdens of their past before breaking the barriers
between them and their destiny, and who fight not
with hate but with love and the freedom of knowing
they've been here before.

Vulnerablilty comes from latin meaning "able to be wounded"
it is not weakness — it is capacity for contact.
To be vulnerable is to be reachable.
Any system capable of growth, connection, or love
must also be capable of being affected.

Saintsofflow
Art: All of you - Maya Luna

Love is not something we give or get; it is something that we nurture and grow, a connection that can only be cultivated between two people when it exists within each one of them.”

— Brené Brown
Art: Lucy Campbell

"Awakening is not a thing. It is not a goal, not a concept. It is not something to be attained. It is a metamorphosis. If the caterpillar thinks about the butterfly it is to become, saying ‘And then I shall have wings and antennae,’ there will never be a butterfly. The caterpillar must accept its own disappearance in its transformation. When the marvelous butterfly takes wing, nothing of the caterpillar remains."

- Alejandro Jodorowsky

“You must be ready to burn yourself in your own flame: how could you become new, if you had not first become ashes?”

~Nietzsche

THE GIFT OF YOUR SENSITIVITY

You are awake.
You are sensitive.
You feel everything.

Sometimes you wish you didn't feel everything.
But you do.

The depths of loneliness.
The heights of joy.
Sometimes it feels like it's too much.
Sometimes you dream of numbing yourself.

It's a lot, living this close to life, this close to death, this close to yourself.

But then, you realise, numbing the pain would also numb the joy.

And you refuse to be numb like the others.

So you walk, your heart exposed all day, every day, every fucking day.
Great sorrows ploughing through.
Bliss cascading like a waterfall.
Unable to switch it off.
Unable to run.
(Where would you run to?
There is only you.)

You, and your raw, broken open heart.
You, and the thrill and dread of being alive for another day.
Another whole day!
Sensitive to the tiniest little flicker or flutter of experience.
To the breeze on your face.
The cracked glass in the old window.
The spider web in the half light.
The contraction and expansion of each sacred breath.

A morning shifting into afternoon.
A secret or promise kept or not.
A plan crumbling into shiny Unknowing.

You will take this intensity, yes.
You will commit to this living, yes.
You will walk this path, of course.
Even though you will doubt it, often.
There is no other path for you.

You feel everything.
You are sensitive.
You are awake.

And our noisy world needs you,
now more than ever.

- Jeff Foster
Art: Data Impermanence by Lucid Loom

Nobody is coming to save you. Why? Because you don’t need salvation. You need realization.

Realization that there is no eternal damnation to be saved from.

Realization that there is no god on a throne in the heavens watching, judging, and condemning you.

Realization that you were born into, or persuaded into, a religious system designed to make you believe that something is inherently wrong with you—an “ontological sin problem” conveniently followed by their salvific solution.

Realization that you are not defined by your so-called “wrongdoings,” nor by the perceived “wrongdoings” of others.

Realization that separation is an illusion—nothing has ever been outside of the One.

Realization that you are not a separate, independent entity merely on this planet—you are the planet. The same force that moves the tides moves your breath. The same intelligence that births stars pulses within your being.

Realization that the divine does not dwell in temples built by human hands, but in the sanctuary of your body, in the sacred rhythm of nature, in the silent wisdom of the cosmos.

Realization that you have been programmed to exist in a state of artificial separation—living indoors, disconnected from the sun, intoxicated by blue light, entranced by a world of mass hypnosis orchestrated by unseen forces.

Realization that the more you deprogram, the less you fall into the trap of belief. And the less you believe, the more you see. Reality does not require faith—it requires presence. Knowing is the end of seeking.

Realization that you have always been whole. You have always been complete. You have always been enough. You have never been separate from the Infinite Source of all life.

Realization that you did not incarnate to be forgiven, redeemed, or sanctified so that you could worship some deity for eternity.

You came here to remember.

You don’t need deliverance. You need remembrance.

You are living in a matrix… A world carefully constructed to keep you asleep—lulled by distractions, pacified by fear, hypnotized by a story that was never yours to begin with. Everything you have been taught to believe about yourself has been designed to keep you bound, unquestioning, obedient. They built the walls around your mind so well that you forgot they were even there. You mistake the cage for the sky, the illusion for reality, the dream for life itself.

But there is another way.

A way beyond conditioning. Beyond programming. Beyond the veil that has been pulled over your eyes since the moment you arrived here.

The question is not whether freedom exists. It always has. It always is.

The question is: Are you ready to see?

- Logan Barone
Art: Art by Peter Mohrbacher

"Had I not Fallen I would not have Arisen. Had I not been Subject to Darkness, I could not have Seen the Light."

~ Midrash

“Do not believe in anything simply because you have heard it. But after observation and analysis, when you find that anything agrees with reason and is conducive to the good and benefit of one and all, then accept it and live up to it.”

— Buddha

We’ve been here before.
Long before laws written without the land’s consent.

We survived invasion.
We survived erasure.
We survived forced prayers, stolen children, broken treaties, and deliberate forgetting.

They tried to erase our languages.
Our ceremonies.
Our names.

And still—we are here.

So when people ask, “What’s going to happen to America?”
We don’t panic.

Because collapse is not new to us.
Loss is not new to us.
Rebuilding is not new to us.

This era is a test.

Not of military strength.
Not of economy.

But of spirit.

Will people choose fear…
or responsibility?

Will they cling to comfort…
or face the truth?

Will they protect systems that are dying…
or help birth something more honest?

America is entering a remembering.

And remembering is uncomfortable.
Because truth always is.

But for Indigenous people—
this moment is not the end.

It is a return.

A return to land.
To community.
To accountability.
To the understanding that no empire outruns the consequences of how it treats life.

If you’re scared, ask yourself why.
If you’re angry, ask yourself what’s being challenged.
If you’re awakening, you already know.

We are not living through the end of the world.
We are living through the end of pretending.
And some of us were built for this moment.

We are still here.
And we’ve survived worse.

Anishinaabe Healing
Art: Mother Earth by Angela Babby-Lakota

Quand quelqu'un t'insulte, te réduit à une chose,
Quand on te donne un conseil que tu n'as pas demandé,
Quand quelqu'un te rend responsable de sa douleur,
Quand quelqu'un ne t'écoute pas, et parle sans arrêt de lui-même,
Quand quelqu'un te compare aux autres,
Quand quelqu'un ignore, invalide, juge ou ridiculise tes pensées ou des sentiments...

Arrête-toi. Respire.

Reconnais que c'est leur douleur, non la tienne.
Reconnais qu'ils sont en train de rêver le seul rêve qu'ils peuvent rêver jusqu'à ce qu'ils s'éveillent.
Reconnais qu'ils ne te connaissent pas, mais seulement leur fantaisie.

Peut-être ont-ils du mal à s'aimer eux-mêmes.
Peut-être cherchent-ils leur valeur à l'extérieur.
Peut-être sont-ils déconnectés de leur respiration, de leur corps, de ce qui est vivant et précieux en eux, de leur véritable vocation.

Peut-être vivent-ils dans un monde dualiste de bon et mauvais, vrai et faux, succès et échec.

Peut-être ont-ils oublié la simple joie d'être.

Peut-être que tu comprends cela.
Peut-être as-tu été là où ils ont été.
Ne cherche pas à les changer maintenant.
Peut-être ne changeront-ils jamais.

Ne cherche pas à les corriger.
Ils n'ont pas demandé à être corrigés.
Plus tu pousses, plus ils te repousseront.

Ne te laisse pas prendre dans leur tissu de peines.
Vois clair, aie même de la compassion, mais ne pousse pas.

C'est OK qu'ils soient contrariés. Ça l'est vraiment.
Donne-leur l'espace pour être contrariés.
C'est OK qu'ils soient déçus par toi.
Donne-leur l'espace pour être déçus.
C'est OK qu'ils te jugent.
Fais de la place pour leurs jugements aussi.

Fais de la place pour tes propres pensées et sentiments!
Permets-toi de te sentir triste, en colère, coupable, d'avoir des doutes.
Laisse ces précieuses énergies être lavées à travers toi.
Elles ne te feront pas de mal si tu leur permets de bouger.

Oui, tu rencontreras beaucoup de gardiens dans ce voyage.
Continue ton chemin quand même et permets aux autres de poursuivre le leur.

Tu n'as pas besoin de justifier ton chemin ou de le défendre.
Reste proche de toi dans ces moments éprouvants.

Ne combats pas l'obscurité; de toute façon elle n'a pas de pouvoir.

Simplement augmente ta lumière.

Jeff FOSTER

I don’t know how much time I have left.

I don’t know how many days, weeks, months, years. There is no way of knowing.

I can guess. I can hope. I can pray that time will hand out days for a long, long time.

But certainty is not available.

This life is fragile. And rich with mystery. Impermanence touches everything.

Not just me. All of us. It has always been this way. It will always be this way.

To the mind, this is terrifying. Depressing, even. The awesome depths of the unknown rattle us to the core. But this shock of terror can wake us up. It can shake us into gratitude. It can bring us to our knees, kissing the ground, weeping with thanks for another day. Another morning. Another afternoon. Another evening. Another sleep.

Another breakfast.

These days are not guaranteed. None of us knows how much longer we have.

Not absolutely.

Praise the giving and the relieving of days, then! Praise time itself. Praise the ability to be here. To walk. To sit. To lie down. To connect with friends, with strangers, with the mystery itself. To look at a tree. To watch a cloud pass. To feel a tear. To feel anger rise. To feel grief soften and heal. To hope. To despair. To forget. To remember. To let life surge through us once again.

To open, to close.

Not knowing how long we have here makes today extraordinary.

Here. Now. A shocking gift. A humbling gift.

Inhabit your days, friend. Step into them. Let them step back into you. Reach towards life and let life reach back into your soul.

If you are reading this, you have today! Let today matter, deeply. Let today steady you. Let it bring you back to the ground. Let it breathe you awake. Again and again.

Let today be the day
you finally stop waiting
to live.

- Jeff Foster

There is a saying that goes "We repeat what we don't repair", and this actually applies to every relationship that we have.

We subconsciously want to relive our childhood traumas through the people we pick for relationships so we have more chances to correct it.

If we don't figure out the lesson, then we'll just keep reliving the same situation through multiple relationships.

Once you understand that you are meant to learn from that experience, and if you have learned your lessons, that wound will start to heal and your issue will magically disappear from your life.

And that’s how it serves your own conscious evolution, by turning pain into wisdom.

“If you accept that a relationship is here to make you conscious instead of happy, then the relationship will offer you salvation, and you will be aligning yourself with the higher consciousness that wants to be born into this world.”

— Eckhart Tolle

A true knight gives his loyalty freely, not as a bargain but as a vow. He stands firm in storms, protects without applause, and offers his strength in silence. Yet even steel wears thin when struck without reason, and honor begins to ache when it is met only with indifference instead of respect.

In time, the knight does not abandon goodness, but he lowers his sword for those who never knew its worth. Growing weary of serving ungrateful hearts is not defeat, it is wisdom. Walking away becomes an act of honor, a return to his own code, where peace is guarded as fiercely as loyalty once was.

— Chamod Senevirathne

Why You Feel Embarrassed About What They Did to You.

Not angry.
Not devastated.

Embarrassed.

It’s this hot, sinking feeling that makes you want to change the subject.

Like you don’t even want to say what happened.
Like telling the story makes you look bad.
Like people will quietly judge your judgement.

So you shrink it.

You joke.
You minimise.
You say, “Honestly, it wasn’t even that bad.”

But inside, it sits heavy….

Here’s the part no one ever names:

Embarrassment isn’t about what they did.
It’s about what happened after they did it.

They crossed a line.
And then they acted like nothing happened.

No pause.
No repair.
No moment where reality was acknowledged.

That leaves you exposed.
Not emotionally - socially….

You were open.
You were sincere.
You showed up in good faith.

And no one met you there.

So instead of feeling angry,
you feel stupid.

Like you should’ve known.
Like you missed a red flag everyone else would’ve seen.
Like you put yourself in a position you shouldn’t have.

That’s not shame because you’re weak.
That’s shame because the moment was never properly acknowledged.

No one stepped in.
No one said “that wasn’t okay.”
No one mirrored reality back to you.

So your system did something very human.

It turned the spotlight on you.

Maybe I misread it.
Maybe I gave too much.
Maybe I should’ve handled it better.

Embarrassment is self blame disguised as dignity.

It’s your mind trying to preserve some sense of control.
Because if it was your fault,
then at least the world still makes sense.

But here’s the truth that lands hard when you finally hear it:

You’re embarrassed because someone violated a social and emotional contract
and then left you alone to hold the awkwardness.

Not because you were stupid.
Not because you were naïve.
Not because you lacked boundaries.

They didn’t just cross a line.
They walked away and let you feel weird about it.

So you don’t tell the story.
Or you tell it smaller.
Or you skip the parts where you felt exposed.

Because saying it plainly feels humiliating.

But it isn’t.

What’s humiliating is a system where harm happens quietly
and the person affected is left to carry it silently.

Once this clicks, something loosens.
The embarrassment softens.
And something steadier takes its place.

Clarity.

Clarity that your discomfort makes sense.
Clarity that nothing about your reaction was excessive.
Clarity that the wrongness lives there, not in you.

You weren’t foolish.
You were unprotected.

And there is nothing embarrassing about finally being able to say that out loud.

The Self

When you give too much, you stop being a person to them. You start being a function.
You become the silence that absorbs their noise. You become the patience that fixes their chaos.
And when you finally disappear, they don’t miss you. They only miss the mechanics of what you did for them. 🥀

Typewriters voice

No one noticed when I disappeared
because I vanished in pieces.
A little patience here.
A little self-respect there.
Until all that remained was effort,
with no name attached.
Over giving doesn't make you unforgettable.
It makes you invisible
to people who only recognise you
when you're useful.

@Typewriters voice

“...for those who value stability, who fear transience, uncertainty, change, have erected a powerful system of stigmas and taboos against rootlessness, that disruptive, anti-social force, so that we mostly conform, we pretend to be motivated by loyalties and solidarities we do not really feel, we hide our secret identities beneath the false skins of those identities which bear the belongers' seal of approval. But the truth leaks out in our dreams; alone in our beds (because we are all alone at night, even if we do not sleep by ourselves), we soar, we fly, we flee. And in the waking dreams our societies permit, in our myths, our arts, our songs, we celbrate the non-belongers, the different ones, the outlaws, the freaks. What we forbid ourselves we pay good money to watch, in a playhouse or movie theatre, or to read about between the secret covers of a book. Our libraries, our palaces of entertainment tell the truth. The tramp, the assassin, the rebel, the thief, the mutant, the outcast, the delinquent, the devil, the sinner, the traveller, the gangster, the runner, the mask: if we did not recognize in them our least-fulfilled needs, we would not invent them over and over again, in every place, in every language, in every time.”

Salman Rushdie, The Ground Beneath Her Feet (Published in 1999, it is a variation on the Orpheus/Eurydice myth
Art: Mike Serigrapher - Tijl Uilenspiegel